6 WAYS TO OPEN DOORS TO PEOPLE AND 6 WAYS TO CLOSE DOORS TO PEOPLE

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Everyone needs other people to help them in achieving their dreams. We all need each other. In the business and corporate world, we need each other’s market and ideas to succeed. In our personal lives we need each other’s inspiration and support to succeed in achieving or dreams.
We become successful when we understand how valuable other people are in our lives. Every successful person knows and understands the power of relationships. No man can succeed on his own, as John Donne wrote: “No man is an island, entire of itself..”
“Our attitude about the interconnection of each of us to all of us and all of us to each of us has a great influence on our future”- Jim Rohn. Nobody is a lone wolf, you cannot succeed alone in this world, but a lot of us are slamming the relationship doors that lead to opportunities and success on our faces by the way we relate to others.

HOW HAVE I BEEN CLOSING DOORS WITH PEOPLE?

1- Feeling and acting superior to people: some of us feel maybe because of our status or some privileges we enjoy, are better and superior to other people. Folks we get nowhere in life with this kind of attitude, because people sense your attitude of superiority. Even when you try to hide or pretend people still sense and know it. Always looking down on people would slam the relationship doors on your face.

2- Acting with blind prejudice: a lot of us prejudge people and cut them of us without giving them a chance. You just look at a person and write them off without ever getting to know them. Operating with blind prejudice closes doors with people. Remember the cliché “never judge a book by its cover”.
3- Guilt by association: some of us do not like people because they simply remind us of somebody else. You ask a person why don’t you like this Guy and he or she say things like; “I don’t like him because he just reminds me of my father in-law”, or because he reminds me of my Ex and so on.

4- Irritability points: Here we just look at somebody and we identify all the little things about them that irritate us and focus on them. For example you just hear things like; “I don’t like the way he wears his tie”, “I don’t like the way she paints her nails”, “I don’t like the way he cuts his hair” and so on. We choose to have irritability points little wonder some of us have such a small circle of friends.

5- Relational Laziness: Most of us would not do those little things that build friendships; we do not return calls, or text back, we won’t send emails o people who email and so on.

6- Mood Swings: A lot of us create fogs around us by our moods. You only look great with people when you are in a good mood, but you are scary when you have a bad mood. This closes doors

HOW DO I OPEN DOORS WITH PEOPLE?

1- Be genuinely interested in other people: Dale Carnegie in his book “How to win friends and influence people” wrote, “you can make more friends in two months by becoming interested in other people than you can in two years by trying to get other people to be interested in you”. Let us train ourselves to become truly interested in other people’s life. No matter how fascinating we may be, it still does not mean there are no other fascinating people out there.

2- Names: According to Dale Carnegie, a person’s name is the most important word to the individual in any language. Focus on remembering that person’s name as soon as you meet them, and use the name during conversation with them so that you do not forget it.

3- Be approachable: Do not make it hard for people to contact you. Most of us when we get a new job, or business breakthroughs, we just cannot be approached any longer. Always be approachable and available to people.

4- Be very forgiving with people and they will love you. Understand that no one is perfect and in relationships people make mistakes, they hurt us. Learn to forgive others.

5- Be easy to work with: you open doors with people by being very easy to work with. Be easy with people. Christ with all his glory and power allowed children and ordinary folks around him. Do you allow people around you or you go about with such air of imperialism?

6- Be a good listener: Encourage other people to talk about themselves. It shouldn’t always be about us. Listen to people and when you speak, find a way to link your talk to other people’s interests.“One who has unreliable friends soon comes to a ruin, but there is a friend that who sticks closer than a brother.” Proverbs 18:24 “Wisdom is the power to learn something from everyone”. – Ancient proverb.

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“THE 4 IF’S THAT MAKE LIFE WORTHWHILE!”

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Have you ever sat down to ask yourself; what am I ever going to do to get ahead in life? Or have you said to yourself, I just do not seem to have a meaningful life. Maybe your life has hit rock bottom and you do not seem to know just what to do to have a worthwhile life. Folks, you are not alone in this, I had walked down that road before. Here is something that might be able to help you:
Jim Rohn shared these very essential tips in his book “The five major pieces of the puzzles of life”. I found them very informative and so I have decided to share them with you.

The 4 IF’s that make life worthwhile:

1- Life is worthwhile if you learn: The way we think and the actions we have taken up until this very moment has been responsible for the way our lives have turned out. The way we think and the conclusions we have reached about life is the sum total of what we have learned. So if we want to make our lives worthwhile then we have to change what we have learned. We can start learning from our experiences. In the past years of our lives we probably might have been doing it right or wrong. So let’s do a review of our past years and see how far we have come. Another way to learn is from the experiences of other people. “If somebody went through something for five years and they wrote a book that you can read in five days, wouldn’t that be an advantage?” Though this isn’t easy to do, but it is a price that is worth the treasures we seek in life.

2- Life is worthwhile if we try: We have to try something with what we know. The only way you can do something is if you have tried it, and keep repeating the process until you have mastered it. Make a commitment to try today. “When the final book on you is written let it show your wins, and let it show your loses, but do not let it show you didn’t play.” Let’s try and do, try and play the game of life. Always look for opportunities to do something with your life. The key to life is to give it a try.

3- Life is worthwhile if you stay: In life we have to learn to hang in there. We have to learn to face the challenges that life throws at us without giving up. Many people quit too soon- when they are just “three feet from gold”. To win you have to learn to stay. Every athlete in a long distance race knows that just because you are behind in the first quarter doesn’t mean you will lose. You keep running. Hang in there!

4- Life is worthwhile if you care: Caring is an important human value. “If you care at all you will get some results. If you care enough you will get incredible results”. Care for the day by using its time wisely. Care for people by helping them see their possibilities. Also care for yourself by being all that you can be, stretch as far as you can stretch, accomplish all that you can accomplish. Always have something good to say.

These tips may be simple and very ordinary as you might have seen them over and again. But success is doing seemingly little and ordinary things in an extraordinary way. Be committed and follow these steps and watch as your life takes a new turn!

Stay Blessed

WHAT IS YOUR MORAL COMPASS?

722580268_ebb485640f_mBlaine Athorn shared this analogy of life in one of his events; “Life is like walking down a road. Sometimes in life, there are going to be people on one side of the road throwing stones, and there are going to be people on the other side throwing sticks. If you walk down the middle of that road, you will be hit with stones and sticks. Sometimes in life you have to stand up for what is right because if you walk down the middle of the road, no one will respect you”.
There are times in life when we have to stand up for what we know in our moral compass is right. So when somebody else is getting wronged, when somebody else is doing something that isn’t right, you tell them this isn’t the right thing to do and I won’t participate. If we want to be successful we have to have integrity. If it is wrong, it is wrong. Integrity means honesty and truth. William Shakespeare wrote, “And this above all, to thine own self be true, and it must follow as the night the day thou canst not be false to any man”. If you are true to yourself you will not be false to anyone else.
Success in life requires dealing with people, and people can only deal with you if they trust you. People love and value men and women of integrity with a sense of humour, kindness and gentleness. As Shakespeare said let us be true to our self, let us try as best as we can to know ourselves, to take a true inventory of our abilities, talents, what we want, our goals. Discover what course of life will fulfil your powers completely. Discovering all these is being true to ourselves. That is integrity. Successful people have discovered themselves, they know what they want and follow their strongest suit. They do what they can do with all that is in them. They do not go with the flow – they are true! They recognize that honesty is good business, honesty is the best means of getting rich.
It may seem like people can gain success and money quickly if they are willing cut corners and act without their compass of morality. While dishonesty may provide instant gratification in the moment, it never lasts. Yes there are people out there without integrity who succeed and acquire power without ever getting caught, and this creates a false perception of the path to success for us to follow. These individuals may have gained momentarily success, but the truth is it is a high price to pay, as the consequences outweigh the gains. Those persons have lost their integrity and the ability to be trusted by friends. “Profit in dollars or power is temporary, but profit in a network of people who trust you as a person of integrity is forever.”
In this life that we have it is important to define what our moral compass is. What is that code that we would live by and stand true to? “The greatest ignorance of all is the mistaken belief that we can ever receive more than we truly earn. Sooner or later there will be an accounting” Paul in the letter to the Galatians wrote; “Be not deceived God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows.” Life can only return to us what we sow. Right now you have great great wealth; you can think, you have talent, and you have time, sow them as seeds. And when days come when you find yourself depressed or confused remember the words of Dean Briggs, “Do your work, not just your work and no more but a little more for lavishing sake, that little more that is worth all the rest, and if you suffer as you must and if you doubt as you must, do your work, put your heart into it and then out of your very doubt will be born the supreme joy of life”.

PRIORITIZE YOUR TIME

4178265189_4785cf3fa5 Time is our most precious commodity and yet most of us live our lives as if we have all the time in the world. You cannot manage time. No one can scoop up time and save it for another day. We all work on a 24 hour clock, and nobody gets any more. We all have seven days a week, one hundred and sixty-eight hours a week, and eight thousand, seven hundred and sixty-six hours a year. Everybody has the same clock. All we can do is prioritize the things we do within the clock that just keeps ticking. Time goes by whether you are just sitting down and watching television or you are taking time to develop yourself by reading this blog post. All that can change is how you use your time, what did you prioritize?
Some of us are so busy in life, but you just can’t find the results of this busyness. Doing less meaningless work, so that you can focus on things of greater personal importance is NOT laziness. This is hard for most to accept, because our culture tends to reward personal sacrifice instead of personal productivity.
Some of us have possessed what Ed Foreman calls the “someday syndrome”: someday we will go on vacation, someday we will spend time together, someday we will visit our old friends, and someday we will do this or do that. For all of the most important things, the timing always sucks. Waiting for a good time to quit your job, and start that dream business? Waiting for the perfect time to get married? To call that friend or relative you haven’t spoken to in years? “The stars will never align and the traffic lights of life will never are green at the same time. The universe doesn’t conspire against you, but it doesn’t go out of its way to line up all the pins either. Conditions are never perfect. “Someday” is a disease that will take your dreams to the grave with you. ”
Money too isn’t the solution. There is much to be said in praise about the power of money, but adding more of it just isn’t the answer to having more time for a better life, even though many of us will not think that way. Some of us have possessed the “If only I had more money” syndrome. This is the easiest way to postpone the decision making necessary to create a life of enjoyment- now and not later. By using money as the excuse, and work as our all consuming routine, we are able to consistently disallow ourselves the time to do otherwise. “Busy yourself with the routine of the money wheel, pretend it’s the fix-all, and you artfully create a constant distraction that prevents you from seeing just how pointless it is. Deep down, you know it’s all an illusion, but with everyone participating in the same game of make-believe, it’s easy to forget.”
The real secret of getting things done is knowing what things need to be left undone. Once you start spending the hours of your days only on those high-leverage activities and priorities that will advance your life’s mission and legacy, everything will change. Remember “the person who chases two rabbits catches none”.
In the Gospel of Matthew 25:14-30, we find a story called “the parable of the talents”, where a man who was travelling called out his servants and handed each of them some certain amounts of money according to their capabilities. Now two were able to trade and increase what was given them, one didn’t do anything about his. And when the master returned he called them to render account of their time while he was away. The two who busied themselves in increasing the money they were given were hugely rewarded by their master, while the other who did nothing with his was punished.
The lesson I want us to draw from this story is that we may not have the same abilities, some of us may seem to have been born with some special gifts,while some others are born without any special qualities. We may not all be in the same environments; some of us are born into environments of abundance and wealth, while some of us into scarcity and poverty, but we have the same amount of time. We have the same 24 hour clock.The ability to prioritize the use of time is what separates the rich from the poor. The highly successful individuals have mastered the use of time; they don’t waste time, the leverage and prioritize. And like those servants in the story, each of us would render an account of what we did with that time someday.
“You are in the middle of a moment. What you have done to this moment cannot be undone. What you do next is still unwritten”- Mitch Albom (The Time Keeper).
Do not let this moment pass “there is a reason God limits our days…to make each one precious”.

4 REASONS WHY WE NEED THE RIGHT PEOPLE IN OUR LIVES

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We all want to have good relationships in our lives; we want friendships that matter, we want family life that is fulfilling, wonderful and exciting. To achieve this we need the right people in our lives.
Here are four specific reasons why we need the right people:
1- We need the right people because the right people connect us to life. They connect us to the power and energy of human living, they connect us to the positive live energy of other people. So we need relationships, we need friendships that are mutually beneficial. There is no easier or more effective way to fill the gap between where you are and where we want to be than having the right people on our side.

2- The right people fulfil the needs of our hearts. We all know what it is like to feel empty, to go through the motions of life and not have a true friend or a soul mate, so the right people when found will create fulfilment of the heart, and eliminate of the loneliness we fee inside, and the connect us on a deeper level.

3- The right people expand who we are; they expand who we can become. Take a look at your life right now, and ask yourself if as a result the relationships you have, you have grown mentally, spiritually, and economically. What new things have you learnt? How have you changed? This will help you determine if you need more of that.

4- The people in our lives can help us attain our God given purpose. This is such a vital element of life because God has a purpose for everyone. You need to be around people who will be proud of your faith in God, and what God wants us to be. Remember you are so vital to God.
The people around you dictate your success. They can also forecast your failure.

HOW MUCH ARE YOU WORTH?

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We all desire the good things of life; better pay, promotions in our offices, vacation to beautiful islands, retire rich and so on. Desiring something is not bad, but how much are you worth?
The truth is you have tremendous potentials, you are much more than meet the eyes, you are unique, you are talented, you are educated, you have a good attitude, but in today’s environment, a good attitude is often assumed , talent is in abundant supply, and a college degree is just your ticket of entry into a job.
To be successful, we need to keep improving ourselves. We obtain valuable skills of living and success through knowledge. Knowledge is power. Knowledge is one of the great ways to break the shackles of a limiting environment. No matter how grim your world is, if you can read about the accomplishments of others, you can create the beliefs that will allow you to succeed. There is power in books. In this innovative times where you have practically any information in your hand held devices and on the go, anyone who is ignorant has only his or herself to blame. Knowledge is the ladder that enables us climb to the top and grab the life of our dreams.
Most of us would not spend time to improve upon what we know, maybe all we know about our jobs is what was taught us in college or high school. We feign excuses, using our jobs, spouses, kids and whatever else we can make up as the reasons we are not improving our lives. Do not be trapped in a rut by obsolete knowledge. “Obsolete knowledge is more damaging than ignorance for with ignorance we simply do not know something and it is easier to ask questions and learn. When we are sure of erroneous data we aren’t even motivated to look for new information, we just cruise merrily along a dead end path.”- Daniel D. Elash PhD.
Make a commitment today to improve your- self worth. Become more valuable. “Reading just fifteen minutes a day will enable you to read one half a book a week, two a month, twenty four a year, over one thousand books in fifty years.” “…I Daniel understood by books…” (Daniel 9:2)
“All of you are perfect just as you are and you could use a little improvement”- Shunryu Suzuki-Roshi (1905-1971).
“In today’s environment you do not hold to a job, you prepare yourself for a wide range of opportunities. The person who welcomes change and continuous learning leads a dynamic life, while those who back away from it or fear it, find themselves on the human scrap heap. You either expand or you become expendable”. – Les Brown.

10 KEYS TO TOTAL FREEDOM

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I just finished reading “Outwitting The Devil”, a great book by Napoleon Hill. It is a book I think you should read too if you want to own your life and be successful.
Here are Napoleon Hill’s 10 secrets to a successful and free life FROM “Outwitting The devil”:

1- Do your own thinking all the time. The only thing we have complete control over is the power to think our own thoughts. “As a man thinks in his heart so he is.” Take control of your life by thinking for yourself.

2- Decide what you want from life and create a plan for achieving it. Also be willing to sacrifice everything else if necessary, in the pursuit of your dreams rather than accept defeat.

3- “Every defeat comes with it the seeds of opportunity”. Analyze temporary defeats and setbacks no matter the nature and cause and extract from it the seeds of opportunity. When you fail, don’t stay down get up and try again.

4- Be willing to render useful service equivalent to the material things you demand of life. Always render the service first.

5- Recognize that your mind is a receiving set that can be tuned to receive communication from God, to help you transmute your desires into their physical equivalent.

6- Your greatest asset is time. The only other thing outside the power of thought that you own outright, and the one thing which can be shaped into whatever material things you want. Spend your time wisely. Do not waste it.

7- Recognize the truth that fear is a filler with which the Devil occupies the unused portion of your mind. It is only a state of mind which you can control by filling it with faith in God’s word, and in your ability to make life provide you with whatever you demand of it.

8- Pray do not beg! Demand what you want, and insist on getting exactly that with no substitute. “You can ask for anything in my name and I will do it” (John 14:13).

9- Always know that life is a cruel task master, it is either you master it or it masters you. There is no compromising point. Never accept anything from life you do not want. If that which isn’t your desire is temporarily forced on you, you can refuse it in your own mind and it will make way for your desire.

10- Remember that your dominating thoughts attract their physical counterpart. “Above all else keep your heart with all diligence, for out of it is the wellspring of life.”( Proverbs 4:23)

CLOSING THOUGHTS

What exactly are you thinking? Why? To what purpose? What are you desiring? What do you have faith in? Yourself and your right to wealth? As Napoleon Hill has said, create an ideal, form a plan, affirm its reality and persist until it is made manifest. Know that you are given the power to create what you desire. Then, just do it.
“The world we have created is a product of our thinking. It cannot be changed without changing our thinking.” — Albert Einstein