Tag Archives: Blame

Don’t Forget to Forget!

“This one thing I do forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus.” – St. Paul.

Many of us are still brooding over the past. We are still weeping over that lost relationship; that lost job, that misfortune; that death; that betrayal; those wrong words we said; those things we failed to do that led us into failure and so on. But folks brooding over the past, however foolish, devastating, painful it has been is unhelpful and a complete waste of strength and opportunities of the present.

There is an old Japanese proverb that says, “My skirt with tears is always wet, I have forgotten to forget.” Unfortunately today, many of us have forgotten to forget and that is why our lives aren’t growing and we are still experiencing difficulties. If this is the case with you, adopt the attitude of St. Paul who forgot the things that were in the past behind him, whether they were mistakes, disappointments, and failures or they were achievements and success. Continue reading Don’t Forget to Forget!

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Is it Just My Society?

Photo credit: flickr.com
Photo credit: flickr.com

There’s one common thing about people who are not doing well, or struggling financially, emotionally and generally failing in life – they don’t accept responsibility for their actions when things go wrong. I know this because I had been doing this – always ready to point my fingers at someone for any misadventure or any failure I encounter on my part. And I have noticed that it wasn’t just me, it is as become a norm in our society. You find people citizens blaming the government, and the government is always shifting their blames on the West and the developed nations for conspiring against them.

When things go wrong with us, when we miss our aims in life, most of the time you find people looking for something or someone to blame. But as a friend pointed out to me recently, blaming others for our problems and defeats in life started way back in the Garden of Eden, when God asked Adam what he had done, he said it was Eve’s fault. Then when God questioned Eve, she blamed it on the Snake.

Today when children fail examination in school, they blame it on the teachers and or the examiners. When people fail interviews or get passed on for promotion in their jobs, they blame it on their bosses. – You hear them say “my boss doesn’t like me”, or  “my boss is tribalistic or partial” and so on. When peoples business are not doing well, and the prosperity they hoped to get isn’t coming, they blame it on other people – their aged parents, Uncles, Aunties, or other family who are bewitching them. When someone who clearly isn’t eating healthy foods, or living a healthy lifestyle falls sick, the blame goes to the Witches and Wizards from their communities and families. Continue reading Is it Just My Society?

You Have Yourself to Blame

It is really intriguing why we often fail to accept responsibilities in life. People hardly want to accept responsibilities for the failings and misadventures in their lives. We blame our Parents, Spouses, Children, Friends, Bosses, Colleagues, Employees, Enemies, our pets, and every other thing but ourselves. The truth is nobody can hinder you from doing what you want, if your mind is really focused on it.  And whatever reasons we may give for our failures are simply excuses, whether we want to admit it or not.

Folks no one else makes you fail, you have only have yourself to blame. True achievers, all truly great people know this truth. They accept responsibilities over their lives, only losers blame others. If you find yourself always blaming others for most of the results in your life, why don’t you try examining your actions or inactions in the events that produced the results, you may discover like I have done too many times, that you are responsible for everything that happens in your life. Continue reading You Have Yourself to Blame

You Are Responsible!

Photo Credit: flickr.com
Photo Credit: flickr.com
Too often when an individual fails to do well in his or her chosen career, education or vocation, you hear him or her say words like I’m not a natural, “I’m not a born Salesman, or a born Doctor, Lawyer, Artist, Architect, Engineer, Footballer, Athlete, etc.” But who is? No woman has ever given birth to a Writer, Teacher, Footballer, Doctor, Architect etc. they give birth to boys and girls. Whatever we become in life, we came about by choice, education and training. As a matter of fact, I’ve never seen where a woman has given birth to a success or to a failure. It’s always either a boy or a girl.

When we succeed in life, we often tend to take full credit. We tell anyone and everyone who cares to listen how we’ve become successful, how we are living our dreams. But when we fail or don’t do well, we point accusing fingers at external factors. You hear people say things like; “I’m not successful or happy because of my parents.” Some say, “My wife or husband doesn’t understand me.” Some blame the teacher, the preacher or the boss. Some blame everything from skin colour and religious beliefs to lack of education and physical deficiencies. Some say they’re too old or too young, too fat or too slim, too tall or too short, or that they live in the wrong country, or the government of the day isn’t carrying them along and so on.Folks, regardless of your lot in life you can turn your situation around and build the life of your dreams. Life is replete with stories of men and women who have overcome all odds to etch their names in the history books forever. There’s no challenge you are facing now that someone else has not faced, overcame, or turned it round to his or her advantage. Stop telling your victim stories. Stop blaming someone else for your lot in life. The irony is when you have your index finger pointed toward someone else, there are three times as many fingers pointed right back at you. So it’s really no other person’s fault. Your success and your happiness start with you.