Often when people enter love relationships or take marriage vows, they often promise to do a lot of beautiful things. The couple promise to stick to each other in good or trying times. They promise to love, respect, endure, and tolerate one other. Yet some of these marriages and relationships end up crashing. Is it that there wasn’t love in them? Or we just don’t understand what love means?
There are many definitions of love, but as a person of the Christian faith, I believe this scripture spells out clearly what true love is:
1 Corinthians 13:4-8 “Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.”
Unhappiness comes when we put our hopes and trust in our fellow humans instead of putting them on God and ourselves. When we are able to eradicate this need of others and begin to believe that our lives direction is determined by God and our own efforts, we will see how happy we become despite the circumstances we find ourselves.
I can tell you this because I have been a victim of this. There were times, a few years ago when I blamed my family for my situation. I felt unloved and held bitterness in my heart, and the result was my lack of progress.
You see the fact is, you can never move forward when you are dwelling in the past when you are heavily laden with burdens because the mind needs to be totally free for it to think clearly.
A couple of weeks back I met a lady who still blamed her situation on a failed relationship of 5 years back. She went on lamenting and blaming the guy for being responsible for her still being single because he left her for another. The guy is obviously not aware of this and had moved on from then to start his own family, yet she was still stuck in that chapter of her life. Continue reading How To Have An Unhappy Life→
Blessings can sometimes turn to a curse in one’s life. Even kindness may be overdone. One may be too gentle. Love may hold others back from their purpose and wreck their destinies. There are times when in the process loving others we meddle with God’s discipline for them.
Of course, we are to be helpful to others. No aim should be put higher in our life-plans than that of personal helpfulness. The motto of the true Christian cannot be other than that of the Master: “Not to be ministered unto, but to minister.”
Even in the ambition to gather and retain wealth, the spirit of the desire must be, if we are Christians at all, that thereby we may become more helpful to others; that through, or by means of, our wealth, we may be enabled to do larger and greater good. Whatever gift, power, or possession we have that we do not seek to use in this way is not yet truly devoted to God.
There are many ways to help others, yet too often most people think if you are not giving material things out, you are not helping, yet the truest and best help anyone can give to others is not in material things, but in ways that make them stronger and better. Money is good alms when money is really needed, but in comparison with the divine gifts of hope, friendship, courage, sympathy, and love, it is paltry and poor. Continue reading The Danger in Helping Too Much→
Acquire the habit of expecting success, of believing in happiness. Nothing succeeds like success; nothing makes happiness like happiness.
So long as you retain your happiness you will retain all your power; and all the power that is in you is sufficient to overcome every obstacle, conquer every adversity and turn every circumstance to good account.
The cheerful person makes a cheerful world.
Happiness is a very beautiful thing,—the most beautiful and heavenly thing in the world,—but it is a result, a spiritual condition, and is not predetermined by your bank account or by the flattering incense of praise.
To live, we must conquer incessantly; we must have the courage to be happy.
To make much of little, to find reasons of interest in common things, to develop a sensibility to mild enjoyments, to inspire the imagination, to throw a charm upon homely and familiar things, will constitute a man master of his own happiness.
The best way to secure future happiness is to be as happy as is rightfully possible today.
Diamonds of shining joy lie glittering in every way we pass daily, but most of the passers-by only stub their toes against them.
“Mental sunshine not only attracts the best from without, but it also causes the best to grow from within. We all prefer the sunshine, and we are naturally attracted wherever a sunbeam is in evidence.”
If you feel cheerful and happy, it is very natural for you to laugh. And if you will laugh a little, you will begin to feel bright and cheerful.
Probably the most lasting source of happiness is found in unselfish love. This keeps alive a constant interest in those who are the objects of affection, which, in turn, is naturally reflected into the relations of life.
Few of us appreciate the number of our everyday blessings; we think they are little things, and yet little things are what life is made of.
A serene face helps to make a serene soul; a smile on the lips induces a smile in the heart.
If one would be happy, let him forget himself and go about making someone else happy.
Look steadily on the bright side of life. Cultivate the grace of a good hope. Imitate the fine optimism of those of whom it is said that they can see stars where others saw only an unbroken expanse of cloud.
Happiness is the result of God’s will for us, and not of our will for ourselves; and so we can only find it by giving our lives up, in submission and obedience, to the control of God.
To believe and go forward is the key to success and to happiness.
They who minister to their neighbours exercise one of the normal human functions, and enter thereby into the joy of a larger life.
Write it in your heart that every day is the best day in the year.
The first step toward happiness is to determine to be happy.
If a man is unhappy, this must be his own fault; for God made all men to be happy.
Happiness is discovered in many unsuspected places.
Joy is not in things, it is in us, and I hold to the belief that the causes of our present unrest, of this contagious discontent spreading everywhere, are in us at least as much as in exterior conditions.
Happy is that person who feels that God cares for him, that he journeys forward under divine convoy, that his Father is regent of universal wisdom, and represents the whole commonwealth of love, who is all Nature, and who commands all Nature to serve His child.
It is no use to grumble and complain; It’s just as cheap and easy to rejoice
We don’t live alone in this world. We live in companionships, in families, in friendships, in churches, in communities and to do that require our ability to get along with others. Yet there are some of us who complain about the difficulty of getting along with others.
These type of people are very good on their own, and when alone, where no other life comes in contact with theirs, where they are entirely their own master and have to think only of themselves, and where they can have their own way, who yet make most wretched business of living when they come into living with others.
Unfortunately this seems to be the new code in the world today. Too many messages abound that praise and encourage people to be selfish, tyrannical, absorbing, despotic, and wilful. People are being encouraged to not brook suggestions, request or authority. All around us we find people who will not make any compromise, will not yield their own opinions, preferences, or prejudices, will not submit to any inconveniences, or any sacrifice. Continue reading What it Takes to Be in Love→
Is this life all about getting money and acquiring material success? Is there nothing better that the scramble for more money, the acquisition of assets and being ranked among the wealthiest in your neighbourhood, community, city, state, nation or the world?
Is there nothing better more valuable to struggle for? Surely there’s as the bible says a good name is better than many riches. Unfortunately our schools and today’s culture have taught us to focus on developing this coarse side of man, while the God-side, the moral remains underdeveloped.
Economists, statisticians and analysts have been be able to estimate the assets and liabilities of individuals to come up with their net worth but no one has been able to estimate the real wealth that inheres in fine character, and a well refined life which brings love, joy, and peace into every home and person it encounters wherever it goes.
It is really amazing to find men and women both young and old pay such a huge price for things that are not worth the while, then they throw away the valued and lasting ones, in their quest for that which will fade and perish. Continue reading You Are Not Here to Only Make a Living→
In the New Testament Bible you find so many wonderful tales of the powerful touch of Christ when he was on earth. Wherever he went we are told of how he laid his hand, left a blessing, healed the sick, comforted the sad, and gave the troubled peace.
But Christ isn’t physically present with us anymore. He lives with the Father above. But what about his touch? Everyone longs for the touch of Christ; we yearn for it in our prayer meetings, in churches, at home, at work, at school, every day we cry for that special touch of Christ.
While Christ is still touching lives in our midst, there is another way in which his touch is felt in human lives; through us. He himself said, “As the Father hath sent me, even so send I you.” God has ordained you and I to save the world, to heal, help, comfort, lift up and build up others.
We have been called and ordained to be as Christ in the lives of the people around us but too often we fail in this responsibility as, we too expect God to come down and save the world when we are his human agents and instruments. Continue reading You Too Can Be Like Christ to Someone→
I woke up with this message; just because someone appears to be doing well doesn’t mean they are. How well do we know the people around us? I am actually very guilty about this.
Folks people are not usually what we assume they are; Just because someone is always smiling doesn’t mean they are actually happy on the inside, they may be going through so much difficulties. Just because someone you know is rich doesn’t mean they don’t have issues.
We have been called to be our brothers’ keepers. How much of this work have we been doing? Look a person may be married, and you assume oh he/she is okay and happily married, but on the contrary the marriage isn’t doing as well as it seems and since you don’t bother to care enough, you will never know. A person may appear to have it all together and living the life, but inside them they just don’t have the kind of peace and joy that you enjoy and can offer them if you get closer a bit to care.
I know we live in a world where everyone is trying to mind their business, where we think getting close to people mean we are violating their privacy but God says we should do better.
Recently my friend came to me weeping and narrating her ordeal; how a friend of hers called her to please go and check on his mother, whom he had been trying to reach on the phone but to no avail. He texted her address and when she got there, the door was locked but it appeared someone was inside the apartment. Continue reading Are You Your Brothers’ Keeper?→
The Golden Rule says Do unto others, as you want them to do unto you. The word DO actually means more than do, it also means think about, wish for etc. So think about others, wish for others and do to and for others what you want them to think about you, wish for you and do for or to you!
Whatever you think about, wish for and do to others you will in time receive yourself! Many times we forget this when we treat others poorly and because the results of our thoughts and actions don’t come back to us instantly, we often blame the devil and fate or bad luck for all the negative things happening in our lives, when actually it is the golden rule at play.
Let the golden rule guide your thoughts, wishes and actions toward others. So love your enemies. Praise your enemies. Ask God to bless your enemies with all the things you want God to bless you with.
Jesus said, what you do unto the least of my brethren; that you do unto me. Think about that. Life can be easy. Feel joy everyday no matter what and without exception. Feel unconditional love, appreciation, understanding, acceptance and compassion for everyone without exception. Continue reading Daily Wisdom: Practice The Golden Rule→