One of the characteristics of people who are not doing very well with their lives is, they are top complainers and whiners. They never can find anything good about their lives and the environment they find themselves. Folks what you focus on, expands and successful people are using this to their advantage.
Haven’t you notice that successful people never talk about how bad the economy is, how high things in the market have gone up, or how many bad breaks they are having? Instead they focus on what’s good, what’s working, or what’s beautiful about them…they always try to find the good in every situation they find themselves in.
Do you want to end this year on high note? Develop the habit of finding the good in every situation. Stop talking about the negative things around you. Stop looking for the things that ain’t working in your life. If you are a Christian, you should be familiar with a powerful scripture that says, Ask and it shall be given to you, knock and the door shall be open to you, seek and you shall find. So here is a question for you, what are you seeking in your life? Continue reading Stop Looking For Faults, Start Looking For Good→
I was taking a stroll around the estate I live recently when I heard some loud screams coming from one of the buildings within, out of curiosity I paused my walk and listened. From what I could make it was a father and daughter argument, with the father threathening hell and brimstone on the daughter. In his own words the man was saying, “You are a disgrace to my name, a big disappointment and I really wished you weren’t my child. After all the investments and sacrifice I have made to give you a good life, all you can come up with is that you are pregnant?”
As I walked back home, I thought of that girl, and others like her who have been abused and shamed by their parents, family, friends, community, or churches because of the sins and mistakes they made with their lives. I thought about the angry father and others like him, and asked, has he been perfect all his life? Hasn’t he been making mistakes? What if God treated us the way we all deserved? What if God gave us instant judgement for our sins, how many of us will be alive today? Continue reading Who is Without Mistakes?→
“Never tear down anything unless you are prepared to build something better in its place.” I think of these wise words each time I read or hear people writing or saying negative things about others. Many of us have a habit of criticizing and condemning others – especially church leaders and their messages. I was on a social media platform recently and someone who has a significant following online was condemning a leading pastor as “Anti-Christ” and not a true believer.
If you find yourself always attacking, opposing and criticizing the actions of others, remember, it is easy to condemn, criticize and attack other people thoughtlessly for their failings and mistakes, and equally easy to find fault in their work or in situations that are not to your liking. It is far more difficult to empathize and help build people up. Until you work their paths you will never know what people go through to get where they are in life.
The bible says the thief comes to steal, kill and destroy others joy, happiness, laughter, progress, work, successes and lives. Don’t become the thief! Negative criticism and condemning others is cheap, so let’s stop doing easy and cheap things. One way to do this is to try and catch yourself being negative towards others, and remember the old saying, “If you can’t say something nice about someone, don’t say anything at all.” Continue reading Seek to Build and Not to Destroy!→
Back in the day one Nigerian musician sang, “when the going is smooth and good, many, many people will be your friends…they will call you many names, they will say they love you, they will say they need you, they will say you are great and so on and so forth.” Agreeing with the old saying that success has many friends.
I bet there are many of you who at some point or the other experienced having many friends when the going was good for you. People don’t often appreciate adversity, most people never believe that everything that happens to us no matter how bad it may appear has some good embedded in it. And one of the good things about adversity or setbacks is that it reveals to us who our true friends are.
Many of us will realize when we are hit by some sudden misfortune that those people we called friends when we were doing so good were actually acquaintances who our successes, jobs or businesses attracted to us as you will indeed be very lucky if you still have a handful of real friends during those periods. If you want to know who your true friends are during challenging periods, ask them for help. Continue reading You Don’t Have Any Friends Until You Are Faced With Difficulty Yet→
People help people succeed. You can’t succeed without the help and support of other people so if you live your life without cooperating or associating with other people you better have a rethink because your success in life depends on that.
One way to get people to help you is for you to first be the one helping others. Go out of your way to assist, encourage or inspire other people around you to succeed. When you make it a lifestyle to encourage others and to help them advance in their lives whenever possible, most will reciprocate when you need their help. Give generously, and you will benefit in kind.
Remember the golden rule, do unto others what you expect them to do to you. Live your greatest life!
One of the best things I learned as a Child of God is giving thanks to God for all things and in every situation whether it is positive or negative. But I have discovered that for most people thanking God for the good things is so easy. When good things happen to you, when good times come, you rejoice and celebrate, but that seldom is the case when you are hit by adversity or some misfortune.
A guy once said to me once, “why should I rejoice and be thankful when bad things happen to me? I ought to be sad, and complaining, so that maybe I can get help somehow.” Unfortunately he isn’t alone with that mindset, because that’s just what most people do; they cry, whine, talk or complain about their adversities and setbacks.
One of my favourite scriptures says, “all things work together for good to them that love God.” No matter how bad I am hit by difficulties and adversity, I believe that in the end something good will come out of the situation. Secondly, from experience I know that things don’t always end up as bad as they seem at first. Sometimes we react based on the information we receive, only to realize later that it wasn’t as terrible as it was reported. Continue reading There’s Always Something to Be Thankful For→
I visited the home of a senior friend of mine whom I hold in very high esteem once and the behaviour and attitude of his young children really marvelled me. I couldn’t help but imagine how a polite, humble man with good character will raise children that are such opposites of him in terms of their behaviour and attitude.
As I kept pondering on the kids behaviours, I asked myself what could be missing? Obviously the children attend very good schools they have good Christian parents who are working quite hard to provide them a great future, they have house helps and Nannies to attend to them, and just then it occurred to me, that the kids lack a mother.
You see while their mother was in the house, she wasn’t so much in their lives. She loves them care for them, provide for them, but these kids still in their formative years are being raised by the house helps. It then reminded me of the words of an ancient Greek philosopher, who once said, “Give your child to be educated by a slave, and instead of one slave, you will have two.”
I have heard parents react to a child misbehaviour or utterance of a negative word by asking the child, “Who taught you that, because it’s definitely not from me?” children learn through modelling and imitating. They model their gestures, their speech, their habits, their character after those of the people close to them. So if you want your child to have a good character, present him with a good model, and the model that should be constantly before the child is the mother. Continue reading MOTHERS WANTED!→
Some news I received yesterday made begin to ask, “why don’t we take care of our old people in these parts, especially our poor old people? Instead of helping them we abandon them, praying for them to die. “He/she is a burden now”, “they are too old and sickly”, we say most of the time. When they fall sick, we never always have money to give them the best treatment we can afford that they deserve.
Every day in the news, what you read, hear or watch is the talk about hunger, poverty and death. The world is seeking for ways to feed people and we forget that there are more people in this world who are hungry for kindness, sympathy, friendship and love than they hunger for food. If we showed people genuine love and care, maybe they won’t be hungry in the first place.
Sometime ago I attended a funeral, and like most of the funerals all over the world, people sent in their tributes and all they had to say about the dead were very glowing and positive things and nothing negative. As I stood there listening and watching, I began to wonder, why is it that death makes us suddenly remember about the hundreds of good virtues in a man/woman who we neglected and considered faulty and not relevant while they were alive?
I was listening to a radio programme yesterday where there was a discussion about gratitude and kindness to others. In the course of the programme, someone sent in a message and stated that he had stop caring about others because in spite of all he does for others, nobody ever shows him gratitude or return favours.
As the show continued, most of the callers’ responses to the message were very sympathetic to the guy who wasn’t receiving enough gratitude and favours for the good he does to others. One caller went as far complaining at how the world is filled with ingrates and unloving people.
Some of the questions going through my mind both during and moments after the radio show were; “why should we write off the world just because of a few bad people?” Why should our love and kindness to others be tied to what they give to us or how we expect to be treated in return? Must everyone whom we show some form of kindness pay us back or even tell us gratitude?
Sometime ago I ate food that didn’t taste very nice but that didn’t make stop eating food again because of my previous experience. Some people drive and unfortunately get involved in some accident, yet they never stop driving or travelling along the road. But you find an individual who helps someone or some people, who later didn’t do enough to repay his/her kindness, says, “I have had my experience, I have learned my lessons. This is the last time I will ever show kindness to people. I did this or that for this and that, and now see what I got in return.” Continue reading So No One is Repaying Your Kindness?→