Tag Archives: Self-Help

Daily Wisdom: If it is to be, it is up to you


Your present and future welfare depends mainly on yourself. Do not look outside for help. Most people rely too much on what others can do for them instead of looking inward first to tap on the internal powers within them.

Do not assume that the influence of others would enable you to accomplish more or do better, if you are not willing to do your own part. Realize that you have within you, all the powers, ability, energy, and resources for building a highly successful life.

There is something in you, a unique ability that others don’t have, and it is your profound duty to discover, develop and use it. Remember the parable of the talents? Just like that ungrateful servant in that parable, you must realize that it isn’t how many talents you have, but what practical use are you making with your one talent.

Stop comparing your life with others and wishing you could have the talents and gifts they have. Instead begin today to make good use of what you have. Whatever is possible for others is also possible for you if you determine make the best of your gifts and opportunities.

Let this inspiring thought give strength and purpose to your life, and ultimately lead you to your rightful position in this world.

Live Simply

No matter how wealthy you are, how much you possess now, when you die you are going to leave all that behind. In my part of the world we bury people inside dug graves. And in all the funerals I have attended I have yet to see a grave that can contain a jet, a yacht, a house, a car, etc. the graves are so big they can only contain your casket or whatever your body is encased in. No one gets to take his possessions with him when he dies, yet a lot of us have wrapped our lives around them.

Most of our troubles stem from our attachment to the things we perceive as important, when they are actually not important. – Dalai Lama. You see, material things are good as they make up our lives but life is meant to be simple, that is why no matter how sophisticated and luxurious the city is, we still appreciate and savour the times we spend in the country side experiencing that simple beauty of nature.

Folks the only thing we are going to take with us is our memory of our lives here. Why don’t you spend time filling up your memory with wonderful experiences; spending more time with your family…they are the only people who will be around you when all else fails. So if you haven’t got one, make one; using your wealth to put smiles in the faces and lives of others around you. You can be great just by being simple as Leonardo da Vinci Said; Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication.

Have the wisdom to savour the simple things. The wonderful memories that they bring will add more value to your life than any of the material toys we spend so much life energy pursuing. – Robin Sharma

Do Small Things In A Great Way

Some of us our notion of greatness is that the only individuals who qualify as great men and women are the big stars, the heads of nations and corporations, people who oversee large congregations, top motivational speakers and bestselling authors who speak before sold out crowds. Yes these are great people, but you don’t have to be big to be great.

Right where you are, there are truly great individuals who are unknown to the world, but they are great. Greatness isn’t defined by the number of followership you have, or by the crowds you talk to or lead. Every one of us can be great just by living our small lives in a great way.

The story of creation in the Bible tells us that God made two lights: the greater lights and the lesser light. The greater light being the Sun, while the lesser light is the Moon and the Stars. You see, “not all of us will be the sun; not all of us will be the moon. Some will be the sun. Some will be the moon. Some will even be the stars. But we must remember that it was God who set each in its place, to serve its specific function.” – Mensa Otabil

Do not wait for the world stage, the big opportunity, the large followers, before you live a great life. You can start being great right where you are today in your home, in your office, in your school, on the street, everywhere. You can begin to make yourself known as great, by doing everything you do in a great way. The Bible says tells us that whatever your hands find to do, do it with all your heart as unto the Lord not unto men.

Folks put all of your being into what you do no matter how small or commonplace it is. Let your light so shine; reveal it to your family, your friends, neighbours and every one that comes in contact with you. Show the world your greatness by living your everyday life in a great way. Be so just, so generous, so courteous, and kind that your family, your husband, your wife, your children, brothers, sisters, colleagues, and friends would know just how great you are. Greatness starts within.

Live your greatest life!

Get Rid Of Doubts

There is something wrong when the children of the King of kings go about like sheep hounded by a pack of wolves.
There is something wrong when those who have inherited infinite supply are worrying about their daily bread; are dogged by fear and anxiety so that they cannot have any peace; that their lives are battling with want; that they are always anxious.
There is something wrong when we are so worried and absorbed in making a living that we cannot make a life.

We were made for happiness, to express joy and gladness, to be prosperous. The trouble with us is that we do not trust God to supply our needs. We keep our minds and our faith in ourselves so small, so narrow, that we strangle the inflow of supply. “Abundance follows a law as strict as that of mathematics. If we obey it, we get the flow; if we strangle it, we cut it off.” The problem is not in the supply; there is abundance awaiting everyone on earth. God did not put vast multitudes of people on this earth to scramble for a limited supply, as though He were unable to provide enough for all. There is nothing in this world which men desire and struggle for, and that is good for them, of which there is not enough for everybody.

If you would attract good fortune you must get rid of doubt. You must have faith. No man can make a fortune while he is convinced that he can’t. The “I can’t” philosophy has destroyed many dreams and destinies. Confidence is the magic key that unlocks the door of supply. If you desire success, you must think success, you must think upward. You must think progressively, creatively, constructively, inventively, and, above all, optimistically.

“You will go in the direction in which you face. If you look towards poverty, towards lack, you will go that way. If, on the other hand, you turn squarely around and refuse to have anything to do with poverty,–to think it,–live it, or recognize it–you will then begin to make progress towards the goal of plenty.”

6 Causes Of Low Self Esteem

The starting point for both success and happiness is a healthy self-image. “An individual’s self-concept is the core of his personality. It affects every aspect of human behaviour: the ability to learn, the capacity to grow and change, the choice of friends, mates and careers. It’s no exaggeration to say that a strong positive self-image is the best possible preparation for success in life.” Yet so many of us have a poor self image and low self esteem, as a result we wander through life beaten and dejected.
To achieve and live our greatest lives, we need to develop a positive self esteem, this shouldn’t be confused with a super inflated ego, of being greater than everybody around us. Below are 6 major causes of negative self esteem that we need to watch out for and get rid of in our lives:

1. Some of us have a low self esteem because our abilities, appearance and intelligence have been ridiculed or questioned many times by the people we care about; parents, teachers, friends and others in authority. In many cases, these hurts come in the form of insinuations, but they are just as real and devastating as if they were true. As a result, we see ourselves through the negative eyes of others. If your friends, family and associates find fault like there is a reward for it, you get a distorted picture of the real you.

2. The tendency to confuse failure in a project, or event, with failure in life. A child who fails a subject in school or who doesn’t make the team, makes the mistake of identifying a single failure with failure in life itself. An adult who fails an interview for a dream job, sees that as the end of his life, he begins to think he is no goo at all. This disheartenedly is often reinforced by teachers and/or parents. Once the low self esteem slide starts, the natural tendency is to feed the inferiority feeling.

3. Untrained memory; for some of us the fact that we don’t remember things or names well makes us feel inferior to others. But hear this; “a perfect memory doesn’t indicate a great mind any more than a huge dictionary, with all the words in it, represents a great piece of literature. Second, the person who can’t remember is infinitely better off than the one who can’t forget”. – Zig Ziglar “Actually, there is no such thing as a “good” memory or a “bad” memory; it is either trained or untrained”. There are lots of resources available, some of them are actually free on the internet that can help us develop and have a trained memory.

4. Unrealistic and unfair comparison of experiences; we generally make the mistake of comparing our experience with another person’s experience. We exaggerate their successful experience and downgrade our own success. Experience has nothing to do with ability. For example there are over 400 million Chinese under twenty-five who can do something you probably cannot do. They can speak Chinese. Does that mean they are smarter than you? Not at all; it means they have had a different experience. At this moment you are doing something that over three billion people cannot do. You are reading this post in English Obviously this does not mean you are smarter than three billion other people. It does mean you have had a different experience.

5. Comparing our worst features to other people’s best features; the world is filled with people who don’t find a certain part of their bodies attractive, and so it reduces their self esteem. Folks let us not see ourselves as unattractive. Inside each one of us is talents or good qualities. Comparing your worst qualities to someone else’s best quality is self defeating. Instead, let’s take our best features or talents, and use them to get what we want in life. Do not forget these words from the bible; “ I will give thanks to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Wonderful are Your works, And my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from You, When I was made in secret, And skillfully wrought in the depths of the earth”.. – Psalms 139 :14 – 15

6. Unrealistic and unreachable standards of perfection that are unrealistic and unreachable; this often leads to failure. Often times when we fail due to our own overly high standards, we never forgive ourselves. We feel we must either be perfect, the best or the worst. And so since we failed, we now think and believe that we are the worst. “This affects all areas of life and is an underlying cause of job dissatisfaction, discord in the rearing of children, unhappiness in a marital relationship, etc. After all, if a person feels he is the “worst,” then surely he cannot believe he “deserves” a good job, a good mate, good children, or anything of merit or value.” – Zig Ziglar.

The Power Of No

‘NO’ is a very powerful word, yet we often find it hard to say no to everybody’s request. Personally I have struggled with this. I find myself saying yes to things I should be saying no to. I am sure you too have had a time too when you should say no, but ended up saying yes.

Why do we find it so difficult to say no to everybody’s request, even when saying yes to someone else often means saying no to a better relationship, a healthier body, and a more successful life.
What are we afraid of when we say no? Successful people say no all the time – to projects, to crazy deadlines, to questionable priorities, and to other people’s crisis. In fact they view the decision to say no as equally acceptable as the decision to say yes.

Saying no can help us get what we want, in unfulfilling relationships, businesses, careers etc. yet many of us wouldn’t say it, we would rather be tactful, opting for phrases like, “I don’t know”, “maybe later”, “I will call you later”, “I will call you”, or I need some time. Folks few people can get angry at you for making and standing on the commitment of saying no when it conflicts with your priorities and values. In fact they will come to respect you for your strength and commitment.Make that commitment today, to say NO to whatever isn’t working for you – in your relationships, career, business, health, dreams etc. When you do this you will discover in the process that your life would be more fulfilled.

Related Posts:

Steve Jobs: Innovation is Saying “No” to 1,000 things (zurb.com)
The Value of Saying No (boss.blogs.nytimes.com)
value of saying NO(tightship.us)
Understanding the value of saying No(sayingnowithoughtfeelingguilty.com)
The True Power of No – How and When to Say It, and Mean It, and Live It(wildonewithin.wordpress.com)
It’s The Most Terrifying Word You’ll Ever Say(todaymade.com)
Power of No Or Say Yes to Everything?(anthrogeek.com)
The Power of Saying “No”(timewellspentnj.wordpress.com)
7 Personal Development Benefits of Saying No (Repost)(www.ronedmonson.com)

The Optimist Creed

“ I Promise Myself

To be so strong that nothing
can disturb my peace of mind.

To talk health, happiness, and prosperity
to every person I meet.

To make all my friends feel
that there is something in them

To look at the sunny side of everything
and make my optimism come true.

To think only the best, to work only for the best,
and to expect only the best.
To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others
as I am about my own.

To forget the mistakes of the past
and press on to the greater achievements of the future.

To wear a cheerful countenance at all times
and give every living creature I meet a smile.

To give so much time to the improvement of myself
that I have no time to criticize others.

To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear,
and too happy to permit the presence of trouble.

To think well of myself and to proclaim this fact to the world,
not in loud words but great deeds.

To live in faith that the whole world is on my side
so long as I am true to the best that is in me.”

― Christian D. Larson

Related Posts:

51 Career Affirmations
Affirmative Thinking
‘success affirmation’
36 Affirmations to Inspire and Rewire Your Brain to Success!


photo credit: realcatholicloveandsex.com/
photo credit: realcatholicloveandsex.com
Here are some ideas from family and relationship counsellors that can help us create and maintain healthy relationships with our partners:

1- Don’t make promises you can’t or won’t keep. Be reliable in small things.

2- Keep short-term arguments in perspective. These will pass if they’re not blown out of proportion.

3- Give thought to the purpose of your relationship. Be clear about what you want and the value of what you’re trying to achieve.

4- Don’t assume the worst every time you have the same hassle. Many fights are triggered by similar events. Examine and try to change negative pattern interactions in your relationship.

5- Re-pledge yourselves to each other aloud occasionally.

6- Keep a journal and photo albums. Read about – or look at − the good times, when things get tough.

7- Examine the key dimensions of your relationship. Look for ways to strengthen your attraction to each other, improve your communication, feel more trust, have more strength of purpose and enhance your enjoyment of each other.

Related Posts:
Healthy Relationships
Healthy Relationships: 5 Simple Ways to Keep Your Love Alive and Fresh
7 Tips on Developing and Maintaining a Successful Intimate Relationship