Tag Archives: Values

MOTHERS WANTED!

Photo Credit: flickr.com
Photo Credit: flickr.com

I visited the home of a senior friend of mine whom I hold in very high esteem once and the behaviour and attitude of his young children really marvelled me. I couldn’t help but imagine how a polite, humble man with good character will raise children that are such opposites of him in terms of their behaviour and attitude.

As I kept pondering on the kids behaviours, I asked myself what could be missing? Obviously the children attend very good schools they have good Christian parents who are working quite hard to provide them a great future, they have house helps and Nannies to attend to them, and just then it occurred to me, that the kids lack a mother.

You see while their mother was in the house, she wasn’t so much in their lives. She loves them care for them, provide for them, but these kids still in their formative years are being raised by the house helps. It then reminded me of the words of an ancient Greek philosopher, who once said, “Give your child to be educated by a slave, and instead of one slave, you will have two.”

I have heard parents react to a child misbehaviour or utterance of a negative word by asking the child, “Who taught you that, because it’s definitely not from me?” children learn through modelling and imitating. They model their gestures, their speech, their habits, their character after those of the people close to them. So if you want your child to have a good character, present him with a good model, and the model that should be constantly before the child is the mother. Continue reading MOTHERS WANTED!

Contentment, Key to Greatness

Image Credit: flickr.com
Image Credit: flickr.com

I read a poem recently; “The Changed Cross”. In the poem, a weary Christian dreamt that she was led to a place where many crosses laid. Crosses of diverse shapes, and sizes. The most beautiful one was set in jewels of gold, it was so tiny and exquisite that she changed her own plain cross for it, thinking she was fortunate in finding one so much lighter and lovelier. But not long after she had exchanged her cross, her back began to ache under the glittering burden, and she changed it yet for another, very  beautiful and entwined with flowers. But she soon found out that, underneath the flowers were piercing thorns which tore her flesh.

At last, she came to a very plain cross without jewels, without carving, or any effect on it. She took this one up and it proved the easiest and the best of all. She was amazed, however, to find that it was her old cross which she had discarded for the more attractive ones.

You see, many of us today are like this Christian woman represented in the poem. We tend to feel that other peoples’ Looks, Marriages, Relationships, Spouses, Children, Homes, Jobs etc are far better than our own, and we say; “I would do or give anything to be like the other person. I will gladly trade places with Mr. Jones”, and so on. Continue reading Contentment, Key to Greatness

OVERCOMING EMPTINESS

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Is this the case with you? You are doing what you think you want with your life, your life seem to be everything you’ve always wanted it to be – you have a job, wonderful family, great relationship with friends, involved in your faith, but still something is lacking in your life. Somehow you’re still restless, uneasy and incomplete.
In the gospel of Mark we find a story about a rich man, who obviously has got everything in life and yet he was searching for something. Something wasn’t right with his heart, in his soul. He came to Jesus with a question about eternal life and happiness. Then Jesus directs him to the commandments, He said obey them. The rich man answered; I have done all those things according to the scriptures…I have lived an obedient life, I have done all things right but still I feel emptiness inside why?
Do you feel the same way? You have worked pretty hard, you have been a good person, you do your best to do the right things, you try to live a faithful life…”why am I not happy?” how come I always feel like there’s something missing in my life? You ask.
Jesus told him to sell his things, give the money to the poor and follow Him. Jesus told him the solution lies in his relinquishment, in the man’s willingness to let go and detach himself from all his stuff, all his possessions, and that seemed so unrealistic and improbable to him.
If our lives are hinged on maintaining all our possessions, becoming rich, then we have to ask ourselves: To what extent are our lives being controlled by our attachment to our things? To what extent does our need for houses, cars, beautiful women, rich men, the need to maintain our status, to keep up with the” Jones’”, dominate our lives to the point that we have no time, and energy. All the time, it seems we are weary, worn-out, restless, and empty.
We often buy into the illusion that “If I just had this…If I just had that…If this would happen…Or that”, then my life would be great, everything would be fine. We think like that most of the time or don’t you? We are convinced that if “I just got married…or if just had a baby boy, if I had a boy friend or girl friend, then I’d be happy and my life would be content.” We have to be careful so as not to convince ourselves that the real meaning of our lives, our happiness and contentment come from the external and not the internal. We shouldn’t think that things that happen to us, those circumstances, that they will change the inside.
Let’s change our value system.The value system that is characterized by our attachment to things. The rich man was saddened because he was too attached to his possessions and couldn’t accept Jesus’ invitation to relinquishment. It is true that we are supposed to have nice things in life, but they shouldn’t keep us from a life of loving and giving, and strengthening our connection to people and God.
“Happiness is as elusive as a butterfly. The more you chase it, the more it flies away. But if we stop chasing it, put away our nets and busy ourselves with other things….the butterfly will come to us.” Connect more to people, lend a compassionate ear, and before you know it, happiness will sneak up on us and overflow our lives.