How to Be Happy in Your Relationship or Marriage

Photo Credit: flickr.com
Photo Credit: flickr.com

Fate, circumstances, or other people may help you discover love, and from there a love affair starts that may end up in marriage, but fate, circumstances, or people cannot guarantee how happy that relationship or marriage turns out to be. Just like a wise man once put it; “No man ever gained a happy life by chance, or yawned it into being with a wish.”
Yet there are many of us who falsely believe that dating or marrying the person you love is an automatic ticket to a life of happiness, only to discover later on that that happiness in relationships and marriages, must be worked for; must be earned by patient endurance, self-restraint, and an accommodation for the likes and dislikes of your partner.

The reason why there seem to be many tales of unhappiness in relationships and marriages is because many of us expect to find happiness without taking any trouble to make it, or we become so selfishly preoccupied that we cannot enjoy our relationships.
Happiness in love relationships can only be achieved through continuous sacrifice. We fall in love, and get married to end our misery, yet we become more miserable in our relationships, because many of us ignore the law of “self-sacrifice” which operates in all things God created. The law, that states that; it is more blessed to give than to receive. Many of us believe that just because we are in a love relationship, we now have a right to so much service, care, and tenderness from those who love us, instead of asking how much service, care, and tenderness we can also give.

Yet another way to stay happy in your relationship and marriage is to avoid the “the little foxes that spoil the vine”. Avoid fault-finding, bothering, boring, and other tormenting habits. We may consider these, little things, but nothing produces much misery in relationships in my opinion as these little faults if unchecked. Finally, you may do everything right, and still experience unhappiness in your relationships and marriages if you leave God out. Remember, “It is not only in times of danger and distress that we want God’s presence, but in the time of our well-being, when all goes merry as a marriage bell. Live away from Him, and the happiness you enjoy today may become your misery tomorrow.”

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14 thoughts on “How to Be Happy in Your Relationship or Marriage”

  1. Great stuff Vincent! It is true that the idea that marrying the person who makes you happy will automatically gives lifelong happiness. But even the happiest of people have to work at those relationships. It takes sacrifice. Thanks for the read!

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    1. Thank you T. Paul. Like you noted,..even the happiest of people have to work on their relationships…and this takes sacrifice. Thanks again for sharing your thoughts here. God bless you!

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  2. This is great advice, however, if your spouse is into porn, lies to you constantly, and finds fault with everything you do, there isn’t much to work with. I guess you just hang on and hope it’s over soon?

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    1. Dear Anahera,
      Thank you for sharing your thoughts here. You see, these things you mentioned;… into porn, lies to you constantly, and finds fault with everything you do…are negative habits formed over a period of time by the individual. But you cannot get your spouse to change just by mere hoping. Hope doesnt produce results, only faith does. So in my opinion, you need to Keep praying, keep loving, and talk about it with your partner. Prayers can change even the worst among us, and loving someone in spite of how they treat us, has a way of causing people to rethink their actions towards us.

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  3. I agree. I have a question here; I have seen many and know many who always give in their relationships. From the wedding day till their funeral. I know they were not happy. What are your thoughts for such situations? Divorce in our religion (I am not Christian, but I do believe in Jesus) is not a appreciable option to choose. But many go for this option because they do not want to lead a miserable life. How much giving is too much?

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  4. Great advice Vince! I try to be the best wife-loving extravagantly, forgiving quickly-and amazingly the best hubby has shown up! Do your best and leave the rest to God! Worry about nothing, pray about everything!!

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